Looking after your own wellbeing is absolutely essential to being a carer. It’s really easy to put off looking after yourself to look after someone else. But, in the long run this is going to make caring and life that much harder for yourself. It doesn’t have to be long or complicated, in fact the simpler and easier you can make it the more likely whatever you do to look after yourself will stick. This guide will take you through what we mean by wellbing and looking after yourself and help you get some ideas together for yourself
Practical support and small, regular breaks (UK)
If you provide unpaid care for someone because of illness, disability, mental health needs, or age, your wellbeing matters too. Caring can be meaningful — but it can also be exhausting, especially for unpaid carers balancing caring with work, family life, and everything else.
This page shares realistic, everyday ways to support your wellbeing as a carer, including how to take breaks that don’t require a holiday, and where to get help.
What “Wellbeing” Means for Carers
Wellbeing isn’t about feeling positive all the time or “coping better” than other people. For carers, wellbeing often includes:
- Physical health and energy
- Emotional resilience
- Feeling less alone
- Having moments that are not about caring
- Feeling more in control and less overwhelmed
Wellbeing is personal. What helps one carer may not help another — and what helps can change over time. Doing one thing might not make that much difference for you straight away, but getting in a routine of taking time to look after yourself, even just 10 minutes a day, will add up over time. You don’t need perfection, just consistent and repeatable time feeling like you matter.
Why Carers’ Wellbeing Often Gets Overlooked
Many carers:
- Put their own needs last
- Don’t identify as a carer (they’re “just helping”)
- Feel guilty prioritising themselves
- Assume support is only for crisis points
Over time, this can lead to chronic exhaustion, stress, low mood, anxiety, and physical health problems. None of that is a personal failure — it’s a predictable response to long-term responsibility.
Taking Breaks from the Caring Role (What This Really Means for Carers)
When people talk about “taking a break”, carers often picture:
- A weekend away
- A holiday
- Something expensive, complicated, or unrealistic
For many carers, that isn’t possible.
Small, regular breaks matter more than big ones
Small, repeatable breaks that fit into everyday life are often more beneficial in the long run than occasional bigger breaks. A break doesn’t have to be long — it just needs to give you a moment where you are not “on duty” mentally or emotionally.
A break might mean:
- A few minutes where you’re not monitoring, planning, or worrying
- Something that belongs to you
- A short reset that helps you come back steadier
These small breaks add up.
Examples of Small, Realistic Breaks for Carers
Different things work for different people. The best “break” is the one you can actually do regularly.
Quiet and restorative
- Read a few pages of a book
- Sit in the garden or by an open window
- Listen to music or a podcast
- Have a hot drink without multitasking
Gentle movement
- Walk around the block
- Do some gardening
- Stretch for 5–10 minutes
- Try a short yoga or tai chi video
More active outlets
- Swim
- Go for a run or cycle
- Do a gym session
- Join a local class or social sport
Creative or absorbing activities
- Write or journal
- Do crafts, DIY, or a small home project
- Cook for enjoyment (not just necessity)
- Take photos, sketch, or do puzzles
A helpful question is:
“Does this give me even a small sense of space from caring?”
Letting Go of Guilt About Breaks
Guilt is common for carers, especially when the person you support is unwell or vulnerable.
It may help to remember:
- Breaks protect your ability to keep caring
- Rest is not abandonment
- Caring without recovery time is not sustainable
- Your needs matter as well
Needing rest doesn’t mean you care less. It means you’re human.
Emotional Wellbeing and Mental Health
Caring can bring a mix of emotions, sometimes all at once:
- Love and closeness
- Guilt or resentment
- Anxiety about the future
- Frustration or anger
- Sadness or grief
These feelings don’t make you a “bad carer”. They’re a normal response to pressure, responsibility, and change.
Things that can support emotional wellbeing include:
- Talking to someone you trust
- Peer support with other carers
- Counselling or talking therapies
- Writing things down instead of carrying them alone
If things feel heavy or overwhelming, support is available — and it’s okay to use it.
Support That Can Help Your Wellbeing as a Carer
You don’t have to figure this out alone.
Local carers services and carers centres
Local carers services often provide wellbeing support such as:
- One-to-one support
- Support groups
- Wellbeing activities
- Help navigating services and benefits
- Help requesting an assessment if needed
In many areas, some of this support is available without needing a Carer’s Assessment. If you’re unsure, contact your local carers service and ask what’s available.
National organisations
National charities and condition-specific organisations can also help with:
- Clear guidance and practical information
- Helplines and online communities
- Support for specific caring situations (e.g., dementia, mental health, disability)
Our What support can unpaid carers get? and Who are unpaid carers? pages can help you find out more about what being an unpaid carer is and how to access the support you’re entitled to.
Practical Support That Protects Wellbeing
Wellbeing isn’t only about self-care. It’s also about reducing pressure and making caring more manageable.
Support that may protect wellbeing includes:
- Help with caring tasks
- Equipment or adaptations (often linked to the person you support)
- Short breaks or replacement care
- Clearer emergency plans
- Support with work or finances
A Carer’s Assessment may help explore these options — but it’s not the only route to support.
Using Strength-Based Support
Strength-based support means looking at:
- What’s already working
- Who is already around you
- What help is realistic right now
This could include:
- Asking family or friends for specific help (one task, one time, clearly defined)
- Sharing responsibilities differently
- Accepting help you’ve previously declined
- Creating a small circle of “reliable helpers”
If asking feels hard, start small:
- “Could you sit with them for 30 minutes while I take a walk?”
- “Could you do the pharmacy run once a week?”
- “Could you handle the phone calls/admin this month?”
Small, specific asks are often easier for people to say yes to.
When to Seek More Support
It may be time to reach out if you notice:
- Ongoing exhaustion that doesn’t ease
- Feeling low or anxious most days
- Irritability, numbness, or frequent overwhelm
- Your own health is being affected
- You’re thinking “I can’t do this much longer”
Support isn’t only for crisis points. Getting help earlier can prevent things becoming harder later on.
A Gentle Reminder
You matter — not only because you care for someone else, but because you are a person in your own right.
Looking after your wellbeing doesn’t mean doing everything at once. Sometimes it starts with one small thing, done regularly, and the permission to say: my needs count too.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is it selfish to focus on my own wellbeing as a carer?
No. Looking after your wellbeing helps make caring more sustainable and protects your health. Supporting yourself does not take away from the care you give — it supports it.
I don’t have time for self-care — does that mean I’m doing something wrong?
No. Many unpaid carers have very limited time and energy. Wellbeing doesn’t have to mean big changes. Small, regular moments that give you space from caring can be just as valuable.
Do I need to take a holiday to get a proper break?
Not necessarily. For many carers, short, frequent breaks that fit into daily life are more realistic and more helpful over time than occasional longer breaks. A break can be anything that gives you a mental or emotional pause from caring.
What if I feel guilty taking time for myself?
Guilt is very common among carers. Needing rest doesn’t mean you care less. It means you’re responding to ongoing responsibility. Breaks and support are part of caring, not a failure of it.
Where can I get support for my wellbeing as a carer?
Local carers services and carers centres often offer wellbeing support, groups, and one-to-one help. National organisations (such as Carers UK and condition-specific charities) can also provide guidance and support. Much of this help is available without a formal assessment.
When should I seek more help?
If exhaustion, low mood, anxiety, or stress feel ongoing or start affecting your health or ability to cope, it’s a good idea to reach out. Support is not only for crisis points — early help can make a real difference.